How I Knit without Knowing How to Knit

Ever since my grandma taught me how to knit when I was a little kid, I have always enjoyed knitting. However, since my grandma lived about 3,000 miles away, she only ever taught me the one stitch, and despite having purchased several books on how to knit, I still haven't been able to figure out how to knit for real--I still just kinda do that same stitch, with the sole variation of the "pulled-out" rows (in picture, above), which is actually the SAME stitch--I just do it twice on each loop.

Not only do I not know any other stitches except for the one (and cast on and cast off, of course), I also don't know how to follow patterns or make complicated shapes--I basically just make flat things. They can be long, skinny flat things called scarves, or big wide flat things called afghans.

To avoid having my knitted items be terrifically boring, as an expanse of one stitch can certainly be, I have discovered the wonderful world of specialty yarns. I use special textured yarns, variegated-color yarns, and I even cut yarn into short sections and tie the ends together, letting them hang out for a "fringe" effect. And that's how I can knit without really knowing how!

Above is a scan of one of my knitted pieces. If you look closely, you can see it's all the same stitch, but the different yarns make it look way more interesting!

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My Crazy Knitting!

When I was a little kid, my grandmother taught me how to knit. I liked it a lot, but because I was a little kid and could only handle so much information, she only taught me one stitch--the garter stitch. So I practiced that sucker, knitting what I could, which was, basically, flat things. I could cast on and cast off, but I didn't know how to make sleeves or ribbed edges or follow any kind of pattern, so flat things, it was. My results were spotty at first--lots of dropped stitches, lots of holes--but I practiced, and I got better at it, producing a bright red scarf from my dad, which he wore, bless his heart. I'm sure it looked a mess.

I started getting older, like 9 or 10, and lost interest, but when I went to school at Moore College of Art and Design, I made a friend named Lee Bradford, who liked to knit. Lee was an upperclasswoman, and she gave me lots of good advice about knitting and fashion and school. She produced very creative, interesting textiles (that's the fancy, artier word for fabrics), and she inspired me to get back into knitting. Problem is, I still only knew one stitch, along with casting on and casting off, of course. So once again I proceeded to knit scarves, although they were far more creative, and I tried my hand at afghans, because they were way more interesting and useful than scarves, and even though they took longer to make, they were still flat things.

Now why, you may ask, would I, theoretically a fully-formed adult, not seek to learn more stitches? Oh, trust me, my friends, I have. I've bought about a dozen books, but I just can't make sense out of the step-by-step illustrations, as embarrassing as that is. Just can't get the movement. Maybe some day I will YouTube it. But in the mean time, I figured out a secret way to make up for my lameness: specialty yarns. There are yarns out there that are twisted, variegated, fluffy, fuzzy, and even hairy (it's called "eyelash yarn"), and I can make awesome special effects with those, even just using the good ol' garter stitch (I've also taught myself a variation of the garter stitch that pulls out to make long rows, which break things up nicely, but it's still the one stitch. So call me The One-Stitch Wonder, but now I sell my crazy afghans and baby blankets on Etsy, and they are also fairly popular  wedding and shower presents in my extended family, so I guess I have managed to overcome my limitations!

Image is close-up photo (a scan, actually) of an afghan I knitted, exhibiting my signature style of different colors and textures. Click for detail!

For more flat things, click here to see my Etsy shop https://www.etsy.com/shop/AllSortsofArt

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